Friday, March 6, 2009

prisoned from her own freedom


today i received a very shocking news,the girl that became my inspiration for the short stories 'selembar kisah dari masa lalu'(a piece of story from the past) chose to bow again before the family's pressure.to let go of the chance for being a happy woman and live a happy life and find a better guy for the future.she chose to live under the family's rule that prisoned her from her freedom to decide.i thought she would not became that desperate about her life and be strong no matter what,but i was wrong.

just last night i watched gong li's raise of the red lantern,how the rules of tradition,wealth,greed, and lust above all logic of a normal human would think. the master of the house freely to do what he wanted to all the women he has.and as if  the women are just playable dolls with no heart and no will.the end was tragic,but i can learn something from it.im grateful, actually very grateful to have my own freedom in life and to choose my own way for finding the happiness,and not become the sheep for the family tradition who worship their name and status in the society.i just wish that she would not end up like the character in the movie,and i regret that i wrote the ending of my story the way it was,maybe i should've written better than that for her. 

i feel sorry for her(my inspirator),i just thought that she would love herself more than anything,love herself enough to respect herself and find a proper happiness in life,and not only live for other's happiness and trapped her own somehwhere and never have the intention to let it free and fly high as a bird. 

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