Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Do you believe in Karma?

Have you ever heard the words of wisdom ' what you reap is what you sow'? Have you ever imagine when you do something, it will indirectly have impact on you later on as the result? you may have or have not. However, for me personally, it's about some kind of chain reaction. you start something good, you will eventually rewarded with the same amount or maybe more goodness ahead of you. On the contrary, when you reverse the action, the result would be much worse than you could ever imagine.

I believe in one of God's virtue in the Holy Book of Alqur'an and Hadits, that a prayer from a tormented or tortured innocent people has no barrier to Him to be refused.In other words, it must be granted as it is. I've been in that certain experience, when unknowingly I've been threatened for no reason for more than a year. Along that tiring moments, not only one time that I almost snapped it out and lost it, broke the wall of patience, but no, luckily I was stronger and sensible not to accept the shallow challenge. Instead of doing the same horrible thing, I hoped and prayed to God to help me and  my prayers were granted. Without me noticing and realizing what truly happened, those people had met the equal payment somehow. I cant laugh of their misfortune but I was relieved that the misery was finally over.

Lately, I 've been facing the similar situation in which I have not expected in the very beginning. As always, I will only do what I need to do as I did back then.I ought to be smarter than that. I will not let it drag me down that low for I believe God's on my side as long as I'm in a good and honest way.I believe I will have God's hands on me when I need it for I afraid when I do something bad it will backfires on me in a much more horrible way.Just to remember,' you can never hide a stinky corpse forever no matter how tidy you wrapped it up, someday somehow people will sense and smell it even from a far'. By then, the consequences are waiting in front of our face to deal with. So,please do remember(including  reminding my own self), when you sacrifice everything just to save you own self or your own accord/interest, even if it means by ruining other people's life or creating troubles, disadvantages, problem, whatever it is, please prepare yourself for greater surprises in front of you sooner that you would've expected. And surely it won't be something beautiful.

my drawing 'sad wings'

Thursday, April 5, 2012

I knew it!

Today, I've learned another lesson that I hardly swallowed with my clear logic.I barely can stand with this kind of bulls*** any longer. I've never expected to be like this, to be difficult like this when I try to be who I am. I'm not the kind of person who love or enjoy herself in kissing someone's shoes just to get good grade that I deserved to get in the 1st place. Life is unfair I know, but how stupid can they be when they just allow such thing to happen? especially in terms of 'respectful' job they're doing. I don't like to show my respect to those who are full of themselves, think of themselves as the all high and mighty people. I won't give to such nonsense, but I put my mind now that I might not take a look another way to that path anymore. I don't want to be another hypocrite, I just want to be who I am.

My parent raised me in a proper manner, and I will just let it go. I just had enough already.